9:54 a.m. - 2008-05-06
Things that I am not allowed to say.
This is what I would love to say to "Blue eyes"
I wish I knew what I was allowed to say to you. I wish I knew exactly what kind of relationship we have. I want to make you understand that I only expect you to be considerate, consistent and honest. If I do something that causes any issues whatever they may be I hope you could trust me enough to tell me. I consider you a friend, and understand that is all it will be. But I would like to think we could at least be friends. Of course that may be too much to ask. I hate that I can�t just be honest. I understand that I have no right to expect anything at all; I understand that I shouldn�t even allow myself to be hopeful of any kind of relationship with you. But it sucks so much. Just your presence makes me smile; of course that is when you aren�t acting strange. I feel like the chance for friendship was ruined by something I said or did.
