8:28 a.m. - 2008-04-08
My Husbands Girlfriend
I have to talk about this somewhere, my best friend seems to currently be unavailable and everyone else in my life wouldn�t understand.
My Husband has a new friend. Which is great for him, he has never really had a good friend, someone who is interested in the same things, and who truly cares about him. So for that I am truly happy for him. The problem with this is it is a 21 year old girl who is in love with him. He says he has no sexual attraction to her, but I think he is lying to himself, trying to convince himself that their friendship is safe, that nothing will happen. And she tells him regularly that she would do anything for him, that she doesn�t understand why I am not crazy happy that I am married to him. See he has told her all the issues we have had in our marriage, and how I am not always a happy, perky person. She doesn�t understand why he isn�t my world and all I need. She doesn�t get how I have wanted out at times. But the thing is we both have wanted out at one time or the other. I think that happens when get married at 19 because you are pregnant and you feel like you have to get married. But I did what I thought was right, I married the man that I loved and would probably have married anyway, I just did it when I was way young. Yes we have almost got divorced; yes I have wished things would have gone differently. But we are still together, we have been married for going on 14 years, and we have worked through every problem we have had. We are closer now than we have ever been. But I honestly believe he has considered leaving me for her. I don�t think he wants to admit that, even to himself. But they have so much in common, all the things we don�t. They talk for hours, text each other all day. Yesterday, they spent the entire day together. I really am trying not to be jealous. I don�t believe in telling him that he can�t hang out with her, that he can�t talk to her. He did that to me a couple of times and it was part of the reason we almost got divorced. Then last night when it upset me that she came by to see him after he got off work too after seeing him all day, he said he wished I wouldn�t act like that. I think I have been very considerate of this situation. He says he is just being completely honest with me when he talks about her every second of every conversation we have. Am I now supposed to ignore that it bothers me to see him having so much fun with her. He just doesn�t want to hide anything from me, whatever, he just can�t get her off his mind and he thinks it is okay to talk to me about it. I don�t mind hearing about the higher points but damn he never stops talking about her. And of course this is the time in my life when it feels as if my best friend has decided to abandon me. Life really has a very sick sense of humor!
