kimluvs2read's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 1st Session Went to marriage counseling today. Definitely interesting. It did confirm for me that we aren’t through, just that we have to work harder. That we have to make us as a couple important in our day to day life. I am sure all we will do while we are there is hash out stuff we have already talked about. But with some else in the room, I feel like we will be more controlled and try harder to understand the others point of view. And of course she will have an opinion and can give us an outside POV. I felt pretty comfortable with her. And hubby seems to. So I do hope I can grow to trust him with my heart completely. I still don’t feel like I want to trust him, I am not sure if I am scared or just selfish, in that I sort of like the idea of being single, that in it self scares me too. I have said before how I know I don’t want to be consumed by the idea of finding someone to love. But I think it would be some fun to start flirting, and not having to hold back. But I know that isn’t all there is to being single. And I don’t want the rest. I don’t want the drama. I don’t want the he said, she said, I don’t know what you mean, bullshit. And no matter what that will come along. So I really hope I can trust him and fall in love so hard that I ignore the wanting of anything new. 1:12 p.m. - 2008-06-23 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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